To Our Friends

Our Friends
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On some occasions, you may decide that it's best for a friendship to end. If a friend no longer contacts you, it's understandable to feel rejected, but you are not responsible for other people's reaction to your problems. If one person ends your friendship, it doesn't mean that others will do the same. If you are the friend of someone experiencing mental health problems who seems to be withdrawing from your friendship, try to understand what your friend may be going through.

Their difficulties may be only temporary. Give them the space they need and make sure they know how they can contact you at a later date if they decide to get back in touch. Some people never make it past the first hurdle: talking about the fact that they are experiencing mental distress. You may feel that you are bothering your friend or fear being labelled. There is no need to tell anyone about what you are experiencing if you don't feel comfortable with it. Some people find it helpful to draw up a balance sheet of the pros and cons of telling or not telling people about their problem. Tough as it can be, talking to close friends can be important for both of you.

It may also make clear why you may be behaving in a particular way or why you don't want to go out or talk to them much. Pick a friend you trust as the first person you tell. Work out how to talk about your mental health problem in a way that will make it as easy as possible for both of you to avoid embarrassment. You may want to practise your opening sentence or you may want to play it by ear. Choose a time and a place where you will both feel comfortable. You may want to think about whether:.

You could phone or write to your friend, but if you do, try and talk to them face to face afterwards as well. Some people react dramatically to news like this. Be ready for your friend to be shocked or not to take it in at first. Although mental health problems are common, this may be the first time they've heard someone talk about having one. They may feel awkward and not know how to respond. This may be because they feel so worried about you or perhaps your news has struck a chord with something in their own life.

They may even suggest that you're fine and just need to 'pull yourself together'. Most people don't know very much about mental health issues so it may be a good idea to tell your friend about the problem itself, but don't overwhelm them. Take it one step at a time. If you're the friend of someone with a mental health problem, you may be concerned about them.

The most important thing is to tell them that you're still their friend. If your friend is comfortable with being touched, a hug shows that you care about them and that you accept them whatever problems they are having.

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Take your cue from your friend. Are they comfortable with questions or would they rather talk about something else?

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Don't promise things you may not be able to deliver. How can you help them best? They did this while sat next to an actor. The actor took the role of either a third student wearing a university sweatshirt, or a professional in smart clothing. When the hypocrisy of the interviewee was revealed, the actor either made a negative remark about their behaviour or stayed quiet. How the participants judged the importance of walking or cycling short distances was dependent on who they listened to the interview with, and how that person reacted.

When sat with someone they thought was another student, and who shared their environmental values, the participants reiterated the importance of cycling. An outsider who commented on the hypocrisy of the interviewee elicited the strongest environmental feelings in the participants. By defending the interviewee from criticism, they reinforced their own view that cycling was important.

This is perhaps because they felt the interviewee might normally be more environmentally responsible. Conversely, if the outsider stayed quiet, the participants judged the importance of cycling the lowest. So, how an outsider judges our peers has a big impact on whether we back them up or not.

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In the face of criticism by a stranger, we might come to the aid of our peers. But if left to form our own opinions, we interpret the hypocritical behaviour as a sign that we can relax our own views.

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This is called vicarious dissonance. This study was inspired by several pieces of work in Australia on vicarious dissonance around sun protection use. View image of Credit: Alamy. How we talk about our health choices with friends can also have a significant impact on our decisions, both positively and negatively.

This is supported by a meta-analysis of 28 studies totalling , participants.

A letter to my best friend:)

Their presence can decide whether we act on that health information or ignore it. Scholz asked college students in the US if they had talked to anyone about a recent experience involving alcohol, and whether those conversations were positive or negative. If they had talked positively about alcohol consumption they were more likely to drink more the next day, and vice versa.

These patterns are highly influenced, though, by the social circumstances that we find ourselves in. When we make decisions we are constantly reassessing the value we might get from each choice — a process called value maximisation. Our decision to take the stairs rather than a lift is dependent on how much we ate at lunch, if we have already been for our daily run and whether we walked into the building with our triathlete colleague. No effect of a conversation with friends can ever be viewed in isolation. And that is why our willpower fluctuates. When this was broadcast in it was really important.

Britain was tired of the Tories and they were incompetent but also the soul of what drives political ideals was gone. A year after this series was shown the Labour party swept to power. Not that there is a correlation there but the mood of the country had changed. Fourteen years later - in - there is so much to admire here, even if the political urgency has past: the writing, production, casting, and threads to the long story, but there also parts that don't work anymore: the sex and corruption theme stands out here.

It also tends to fall into dirge over the miner's strike - as important as that was but like some other elements it is a bit close to agitprop-theater of the s. The biggest impression made now is that we have lost this type of story on TV. We are too involved with reality TV rubbish and contest shows of dubious merit and consuming more junk than stories about how people live. And finally, in an era of spin politics it reminds us that politics starts from simple things like housing and respect.

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The Invisible Committe To our friends October Originally published as À nos amis in & translated from the French by Robert Hurley. From crisis capitalism to cybernetics, and from infrastructure to political destitution and the commune, To Our Friends engages in lively and innovative ways with the contemporary situation. The Invisible Committee's The Coming Insurrection was a phenomenon, celebrated in some.

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Edit Cast Complete series cast summary: Christopher Eccleston Nicky Hutchinson 9 episodes, Mark Strong Tosker Cox 9 episodes, Gina McKee Geordie Peacock 8 episodes, Peter Vaughan Felix Hutchinson 8 episodes, David Bradley